How to Be Confident and Make a Good First Impression
Imagine yourself waking up on the day of an event where you know for certain you will be meeting many new people. You wake up with a smile. You’ve had this date highlighted in your calendar for the last two weeks. You have decided that you WILL be putting forth your best effort today.
Before negative thoughts creep into your mind about cancelling, you remind yourself that you are fully committed to this and you are prepared to take the bull by the horns HEAD ON. You will not shy away from this opportunity, as you have already acknowledged that today’s is special comparing to the rest and is important for your future.
“Laugh, and the world laughs with you.” ~ Ella Wheeler Wilcox
You have talked to your family and friends about this day in advance and have gotten their support and they are confident that you will succeed. But most importantly, YOU have the confidence that you will succeed.
Use These Strategies to Make a Good First Impression. Attract the Right Kinds of People Into Your Life. Create New and Exciting Opportunities For Yourself Only by Changing Your Self-Perspective
Wake up with an idea of what you want to accomplish today and just go for it. If you are focused, motivated, and do your best to follow this steps, be sure that you are on the right way.
Wake up with an idea of what you want to be
Today you woke up 30 minutes earlier than usual to prep mentally. You go through your regular morning routine. You have picked a special breakfast and outfit just for this occasion. You look in the mirror and practice your smile. You are smiling with both your mouth AND your eyes. You look and feel like a million bucks. You go girl!
Even if you don’t feel 100% today (you woke up with a stomach ache, your boyfriend broke up with you a week before, etc.), it’s irrelevant. Because you look the part. And to people who don’t know you, whom you are meeting for the first time, that’s all that counts. Put your inner turmoil on hold, and walk out that door knowing that you will IMPRESS the heck out of anyone you come into contact with. Fake it till you make it.
You take each interaction one at a time; if someone goes out of their way to approach you, you automatically assume that what they have to say is important. Even if it isn’t, you act like it is. It’s worth your time to carefully listen and stop to think before responding.
If you are happy with what they are saying, you smile. If you are indifferent, you smile. If you are uncomfortable, you smile. You have talked to a few people now and have become comfortable with yourself and the environment you are in. Your mind has created an atmosphere of positivity and your true personality starts to come out.
That day, you added 5 important contacts to your phone and secured a job interview. You met an attractive guy or girl and you were their main focus the entire time. People you didn’t have the time to talk to that day took notice of you.
Be aware of your success
Whatever the result is, it is a drastic improvement. You practiced the techniques you researched in order to improve your mental outlook and the difference was shown in the way you carried yourself that day.
And it all started with the mindset you adopted when you woke up in the morning. You started the day with a positive attitude and that snowballed into tangible successful results. You were projecting confidence. You learned how to make a good first impression.
Positive Feedback Loop
What I described above is an example of a POSITIVE FEEDBACK LOOP. A positive feedback loop in this case can simply be explained as a series of failures that are viewed as positive learning experiences for future use. You learn from mistakes and you move on. That time you used to spend dwelling on negative experiences, you are now using more constructively to improve upon. This leads to desired results that help further reinforce positive behavior. It is a beautiful cycle, and it is a trait of anyone who projects confidence.
What Creates a Positive Feedback Loop?
Making mistakes and learning from them Constructive criticism; feedback that actually helps improve your behavior. Results that validate positive behavior
What DOESN’T Create a Positive Feedback Loop?
Overthinking Worrying about what you cannot control Beating yourself up over past mistakes Creating negative feedback loops happens when you are so critical of yourself after failure that it is detrimental to your mental health and well-being. You start out expecting the worst out of yourself, and that negative state of mind leads to further negative outcomes. It is a vicious cycle.
A Positive Mental Outlook is What Keeps Doors Open to Opportunity
Do you consider yourself a lucky person? Whether you’d say yes or no, I’m under the firm belief that most of your luck is CREATED by you, rather than stumbled upon. The result doesn’t always have to be positive. As long as you are consciously aware of what you need to improve on for next time. If you are unsure of how to begin, let’s outline the fundamentals.
Did you know that the simple act of smiling makes you happier? Incorporate it into almost any situation, regardless of how you’re feeling. Fake it till you make it. People perceive you as being a happy person thus validating your smile as a POWERFUL weapon that should be used liberally. The end result? You will become a happier person, just from the simple act of smiling alone.
Smiling is universal; it’s the same across all cultures. If you consider yourself the least socially skilled person on the planet, the simple adjustment of getting used to making your face look genuinely happy will more often than not make someone remember you. This is how to make a good first impression. I’ve been told by some that I look foolish, smiling for no reason. This smile has secured jobs, created lasting relationships, and improved my outlook on life. I’d rather be remembered as the fool who smiles than not be remembered. And that’s basically what it comes down to. Your smile is everything. It is the easiest way to project confidence.
Listen First, Ask Questions Later
Projecting confidence isn’t always what you do, but what you don’t do. You want to know how to become a better listener? First, take your ego and throw it out the window. What you have to say isn’t as important as you think it is. At least not to the person you are talking to. You put their voice and what they have to say ABOVE your own. That is how you give a complete stranger ULTIMATE respect. When you give respect, you will get it back more often than not.
Even the best of us have a habit of sometimes interrupting the person when we feel like we have something important to say. Apologize and let them go first. If you forget what you wanted to say, it doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. As long as you caught what they said and acknowledged it. That’s the mentality that makes new friendships. Talking is just repeating what you already know. By listening, you actually learn new things.
Tone of Voice
I’m sure you’ve heard the cliché: “It’s not what you say but how you say it”. Well this is especially true for first impressions. Your timing, delivery, and energy are even more important than what you have to say.
Practice speaking clearly with emphasis on key words. Grab their attention by speaking loudly when they look distracted, tone it down when you have their attention.
Freak them out: If the other party is bored, make them laugh; it almost never fails.
If they look bored and you don’t know what to say, make a funny face or a noise. If you do it with energy and the other person is kind, you’ll get a laugh!
The things you say don’t always have to be meaningful or constructive for the conversation. If you pay attention to varying your tone of voice according to the situation, most people respond positively.
If using morse code isn't working, try pause more when you talk
Use pauses when you talk, almost like morse code. Silence is golden in the right circumstances. It lets what you have to say sink in before moving onto another topic, or even better: allows them to say what’s on their mind. Confidence is a state of mind. Anyone can fake confidence at any given time. In fact, most successful people do. In fact, you might even say that faking confidence is the key to their success.
Life is a series of trial and error that eventually leads to a desired behavior. You must fail to eventually succeed.