How to Keep a Conversation Going With a Guy 101
When we encounter someone we really like, our body starts doing the strangest things. Our heart starts pumping more blood, and for some reason that blood almost always finds its way to our cheeks and palms. It's also not uncommon that our breathing becomes uneven, and… Oh, here it goes: We start stuttering.
To sum it up, with sweaty palms, choked up, and blushing, we are standing right in front of that one guy we want to look best for. And, as if our biological reaction isn't enough, all of a sudden we remember about all those social conventions we are expected to follow, most of which include that otherwise really simple task: Talking.
It's precisely on that occasion that we usually become social dummies who can't even keep the conversation going, let alone make it interesting. Luckily, with some practice you can overcome that blockage and become the master on how to keep a conversation going with a guy.
How to Keep a Conversation Going With a Guy
1. First things first
Omit the things that are distracting you. A couple of well calculated breaths can help you with that excess perspiration and even give you a tiny boost of confidence.
2. Elaborate on your last topic
You know you can do this one. It's basically like connecting dots. Just a grown-up version.
3. Transition to a similar topic
Like your teacher taught you: Coherence is the key. If you have no idea how to continue the last topic you talked about, do something about it.
4. When he's the shy one
Shy ones are really the cutest, but when he's shy and you're nervous, it can get a bit tricky.
5. What are your plans?
Who knows, maybe you won't only continue a conversation, but also schedule a date!
6. Don't be the only one who talks
Balance is the key. It's time to learn how to find the fine line between communicating and excessive talking.
7. Be a clever communicator even when texting
Be the texting master. Use emoticons to prove your point.
7 Things That Actually Work on Guys: You want to avoid awkward silence, and we want you to avoid awkward silence; But does he know what's going on? Learn how to keep a conversation going with a guy.
We mentioned many times before that during an encounter with your crush, talking is really just one way of communicating. We actually manage to say so much more using our body language and eye contact. Still, without talking it all becomes mostly awkward for both for us. So, we better master that skill of how to keep a conversation going with guys.
1. First things first, make eye contact
Let's first get you to actually look him in the eyes without making a fool of yourself. You have to learn how stay composed while making a direct eye contact with him. Start by looking at him while he's talking to you. That's the easy part.
Now, make sure to keep that eye contact while you are talking to him. That one's hard because, as we've said, your own body is toying with you while you try to stay focus on what you want to say, with the added bonus of having to look directly into his eyes.
Here's a tip: While talking to him, imagine that you're talking to your best friend, and trick yourself into feeling more comfortable while talking. Eventually, once you do figure out that talking to him is not such a disaster as it first seemed, and that you actually spent several minutes actively conversing, it all gets better with time.
Just keep the topics going.
2. Go into detail elaborating on your last topic
Make the best of it! If he asked you about the results of your last calculus test and right after you've given him the answer the entire conversation went silent, simply pick up where you left off.
"How do you think you did this time?"
"Did [insert tricky study unit] give you hard time, too?"
"Did you know how to answer the last question?"
If you talked about pets and now you're slowly sinking into silence, you need to do something. If your question is how to keep a conversation going with a guy in this case, the answer is to continue talking on a similar topic.
"A couple of years ago my neighbor adopted the cutest little German Shepherd who…" is a beginning as good as any.
3. Always be one step ahead with a transition reading to dive into a similar topic
Let's again go with pets. If you talked about your current or previous pets, and you don't know how to keep a conversation going, you can stir the conversation with a question like: "What do you think about pet adoption? Yesterday I read a really interesting article and it really got me thinking…"
And if you were talking about how awful coffee was in your cafeteria, you can always stir it to the topic of which are the best places in town where you can get a decent cup of coffee.
4. Is he shy?
Though you rarely even consider it, a conversation can actually sometimes die because he's too shy or nervous to focus while talking to you.
And that's something you can relate to. That's why, when such moments come, you naturally wish to do something that can help him feel better, or at least more at ease around you.
The method that has probably proven most fruitful in such situations is cracking a joke. A casual benign joke coming from you will show him that you are just another down-to-earth person he can feel comfortable around.
The only thing you need to pay attention to is not to make the joke insensitive. Until you're not sure what he's into, try to avoid dark humor at all costs.
When telling a joke to your date or your possible date, the safest way to go is the same as with the jokes to tell him, your boyfriend. Keep it light and with a hint of cheesiness.
5. Ask him, "What are your plans?"
On our way to discovering all the ways on how to keep a conversation going with a guy, this must be the simplest one of all.
When all else fails, and you can't come up with a clever question that with get you going, just ask him what are his plans for today. The chances are that among his today's plans there's a new topic hiding, and if there isn't, it will at least give you enough time to come up with something new.
If he says that he has a basketball practice tonight, you can stir the conversation in that direction. How long has he been playing? What is his favorite team? In what position does he play? Are they going to have a game soon? Usually the best conversation questions are the open-ended ones, keep that in mind.
6. Don't feel like you have to be the only one who talks
There are also cases, and I know you are familiar with such, when a person gets so nervous over a chance that a conversation would die in silence that she simply can't stop talking. But, instead of maintaining a conversation, what a person does is completely different.
By not letting another person participate in a conversation, you can actually lower your chances of them being interested in a conversation.
So be tactical: even a shy guy can be willing to communicate if he's given a chance. Lead a conversation, don't smother your interlocutor.
7. Don't use texting as an excuse for not being a clever communicator
We live in the age of smartphones and texting. And despite the fact that we don't have to look each other in the eye while communicating through texts, at certain situations we can still experience difficulties in maintaining a conversation. And I am not talking about technical difficulties (though it wouldn't bother you if you would clean that cache from time to time, just saying).
Let's finally reveal that mystery on how to keep a conversation going with a guy texting!
For once, don't give one word replies. He could understand that as a signal that you are not interested.
Secondly, stick to that rule about open-ended questions, and stick to the engaging topics on something that is relevant for the moment. If a tv show you're both following is currently on, text your opinions about interesting moments.
If you're playing the same online game, sink into a conversation about your previous match, or about the gear you are planning on buying.
Because communication via texting is limited in terms of presence, the person you are talking to is missing on many communicative cues of face-to-face communication. Though emoticons can partially help in expressing the emotion or particular intention, they are often not good enough.
That is why, to avoid bringing a conversation to a sudden end, avoid harsh jokes keep your irony and sarcasm bars in check, just in case. I am pretty sure that your goal is not to come on too strong.
However, if you want to share a joke or tease him a bit, make sure that your intention to do that is obvious. Though some people find hashtags in texts to be distasteful, in situations like this, hashtags can be of great use, as they will clearly show that your point was to amuse, and nothing else.
To wrap it up. If you are naturally shy and lack communication skills, that doesn't mean the end of the world for you and your social life. These skills are exceptionally easy to practice. Even more, the practice can be quite fun if you bring a couple of friends over to help you. Also, using a mirror can be of great use, as you'll get to practice facial expressions right there, while you're in the moment.
Finally, all of this will be so much easier on you once you accept the fact that the other person is probably going through the same thing you are. And that person will be positively relieved once he sees that under that blushy exterior there's a really interesting person he could talk to for hours.
