Losing Your Best Friend: How to Handle It
Maybe your friend moved to a different city or you had a fight and you don't really talk anymore. Friends always come and go and it is just natural to have fights or to grow apart. However, this doesn't mean that getting over the loss of a friend will ever get any easier. The process will require a lot of patience, acceptance, and power of will. However, you could also think of answers to how to make your best friend who is a guy miss you and get him back.
1. Respect their decision
Regardless how childish you think your friend is being, you have to respect their decision of not being friends with you anymore. Losing your best friend isn't easy, but you can't make someone be friends with you if they don't want to.
2. People change
All people are constantly changing, so at one point you might realize that your friend is a whole different person from what you used to know. This is life. You can be sure that you have changed a lot too, you just don't see it yet.
3. It's their loss
You might think "losing my best friend is the worst thing that could happen to me". However, the truth is that losing you is the worst thing that could happen to them. Maybe it was your fault, maybe it wasn't.
4. Take time to mourn
Losing a friend is a major change in your life and you will need time to get used to the idea. Do whatever you need to do to get over your negative feelings. It might help to play music really loud, to scream, or to hit the pillows.
5. Let it go
Once you get to terms with your own feelings, you should find the strength to let it go. Losing a best friend will only become more difficult if you carry all that anger and frustration with you. Decide to let all those feelings slip away.
6. Don't burn your bridge
Regardless of what happens between your friend and you, you should never burn bridges. There is no need to be mean or unjust. You can never know when you will meet again and, who knows, someday you will need your ex-friend's help.
What Coping Mechanisms Can You Use When You Are in the Situation of Losing Your Best Friend? Which Is the Best?
What would you do when being faced with losing your best friend? Is this something you could ever be truly prepared for?
1. Respect their decision of not wanting to be your friend
You can't force them to be your friend
A lot of women think that "losing my best friend is the worst thing that could happen". The truth is that it isn't. If someone doesn't want to be friends with you anymore, it is their decision and there is nothing you could do about it. If you try too hard, you will only make the situation worse. However, if you think that there is a possibility for you to be friends again, it might be worth the effort. You just have to ask yourself whether or not you'd like to be friends with someone who was willing to give up your friendship just like that.
In case you are thinking about losing best friend, you should never say things like "you have to be friends with me", even though this might be exactly how you feel. Nobody has to be friends with you; it is a choice they have to make for themselves.
2. People change faster than you imagine
Change can be good
Change is a part of life and there is no way for you to stop it. If you are wondering how to cope with losing a best friend, you have to remember that you are a great person and anybody would be lucky to have you as their friend. The best thing you could do is to see this situation from a realistic point of view. Maybe you both have changed so much that the thing, which brought you together in the first place, doesn't exist anymore. Putting an end to it now is better than to keep pretending you are still friends. On the other hand, if your friend isn't willing to put some effort into making your friendship work, maybe it's just not worth the effort.
A friendship, just like any other kind of relationship needs balance to work. Losing best friends isn't easy, but it wouldn't have worked anyway if only you were trying. This is something you have to understand on a conscious level.
3. It's their loss, not yours
You are a valuable friend
In case you would like to know how to deal with losing a best friend, you should remember that you're not the only one losing a friend. Your friend is losing you as a friend too. You have to believe that you are a valuable person and everybody should feel lucky to call you their friend. You shouldn't only feel sorry for yourself for you loss, but for your friend as well. It is their problem that they couldn't see how much you meant to them. Always see the glass half full. It's not you; it's them. Just ask yourself: can you imagine your life without your friend in it? Most probably you can and this means that you will find the strength to move on.
4. Take time to mourn your loss
A loss is still a loss
There is no recipe when it comes to how to get over losing a best friend. Just do what you have to do to get through this loss of yours. Some people feel better if they cry, shout, scream, listen to loud music, or hit something. Most probably you are feeling rage, sadness, anger, or disappointment and you have to find a way to let it all out. These are destructive feelings that you should let out to be able to move on with your life and have a fresh start. You might think that the solution is to forget you ever knew your friend. However, it is nice to hold on to the nice things you went through together, all the parties you attended, the trips you took, and the fun you had. Keep in mind that everything happens for a reason and faith has something great prepared for you.
5. Let it go and move on
Change can be good
As it has been mentioned before, if someone decides that they don't want to be friends with you anymore, it is their loss. In the same time, this is something they will have to deal with, not you. When it comes to how to deal with losing your best friend, you already know that you have to let it all out. There is no point in carrying around all that negative energy. It will only delay the healing process and it will be more difficult for you to go on with your life. Just remember that lost friends don't mean the end of the world. You can get new friends in no time. It is possible that your ex-friend made a mistake and it is also possible that it was all your fault. Regardless of the situation, you have to be able to forgive yourself and start over. Beating yourself up about it won't help. Decide on a direction you want to take and don't look back.
6. Don't burn your bridge – you can never know what happens
Things are never really over
You might think that your ex-friend doesn't mean anything to you anymore and that you won't have anything to do with them ever again. Well, the thing is that you can never know what will happen in the future and someday you might find yourself in need of some help from an ex-friend. This is why you should never be rude to them and try to part ways in a civilized manner. There is no need for name calling or other nasty behavior. You may not get along now, but, who knows, sometime in the future you could become friends again or you might have to work together and you don't want your past to get in the way.
There is a special case when you have to deal with losing a best friend to death. This is an entirely different situation and you may use the help of a grief counselor. They will tell you what to do and how to manage the situation to be able to deal with it. Whatever happens, you have to remember that life goes on and these are the times you realize you are stronger than you thought.