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How to Manage Anger: Safe Ways to Tone down Your Emotions

If you had some very unpleasant situations happening to you, because you were not able to mindfully express anger, control your anger, if people got hurt because you said things before thought about what you were saying, then you are not alone.

Manage your anger

Psychologists all around the world taking on anger management issues have come to a the final conclusion that there are many anger management techniques that can easily be used to improve the quality of life. It is not hard to learn them, because even a regular people know enough to be able to understand how to manage anger issues and make them work for you. Of course, dealing with various types of aggression needs different approaches, such as coping with passive aggressive people but in general, knowing basics helps in most of situations with managing anger.

angry woman in mid scream of frustration

How to manage anger

1. Count

Once you feel that you are going to explode, remember- start counting to 10, because no matter how funny it might sound now, it helps a lot. While counting, have in mind other anger controlling techniques and apply them accordingly.

2. Just breathe

Take a deep breathe because it will at least give you some time to think and it will relax your muscles, so you will feel a bit less tensed instantly. Less tension means less bad feelings, as well.

3. Think happy thoughts

Don't keep on thinking about the specific thing that made you angry, it is a vicious circle and it can intensify your anger for no reason. Think about something that makes you happy.

4. Internalize body reactions

Your body reacts along with your mind, adrenalin levels are rising, you might feel like making your point by hurting someone, but it is not a good idea.

5. Don't act under the influence of anger

Be very careful what you are saying when angry, because you might hurt people you care about, and thing once said can't be unsaid and sometimes can't be fixed with apologies.

6. Know yourself, especially things that frustrate you

Knowing what frustrates you will help you to predict things, which is a very important thing in anger management.

7. Pick an environment less prone to cause frustration

If you still can't control your anger issues, do your best to avoid situations that frustrate you, if possible, since it will make it easier for you to face them, once you learn other anger management techniques.

It Is Not That Hard to Control Anger When You Have Important Steps Described and Explained, so You Can Learn Many Ways to Manage Anger in Various Situations and Prevent Unpleasant Situations

Anger management isn't easy to say the least. You may be calm one moment. You may be overflowing with emotion another. So here is how to manage anger, i.e. tone down your emotions before it is too late.

1. Start counting to ten, because it will give you time to cool down

Once you feel that you are going to explode, remember- start counting to 10, because no matter how funny it might sound now, it helps a lot. While counting, have in mind other anger controlling techniques and apply them accordingly. Since you are learning how to manage your anger, do not lose patience and stay focused on your goals, even if it looks like nothing is changing, because it takes time to master anger management skills, and you need to start from the easiest one. Counting to ten is not only for kids.

2. Deep breathing is essential, since it relaxes muscles and makes you feel less tensed

A deep breath is needed once your frustration gets to a specific high level, because it will at least give you some time to think and it will relax your muscles, so you will feel a bit less tensed instantly. Less tension means less bad feelings, as well. It is a very important part of anger management skills, since it affects your body, which affects your mind and reduces tension so you could think things through without burning inside.

3. Happy thoughts will focus your attention to something else and you will not be stuck with frustrating thoughts

Once you feel that a level of anger inside your head is reaching a critical level, don't keep on thinking about the specific thing that made you angry, it is a vicious circle and it can intensify your anger for no reason. Think about something that makes you happy and it will, at least change your focus and you will not keep on thinking about frustrating situations or aspects that are just making things worse. What you need, to be able to manage anger properly is as clear mind as possible. Happy thoughts might just help you reach one.

4. Body reactions are very important, so get to know them and learn how to control them, because it will make everything easier

Wishing to punch someone

Your body reacts along with your mind. Once you are frustrated and levels of adrenalin start reaching high levels, you might just feel like punching someone, although it is not a good solution. What you need is a clear mind and relaxed muscles, so you could think before reacting, because reactions might end up bad. Everyone who has ever had anger management issues knows how important is not to make yourself regret what you did, while you were angry.

5. Watch your words before you say them, because what is said cannot be unsaid, and if you hurt someone you love, it might feel very bad

Be very careful with what you are saying when angry, because you might hurt people you care about, and thing once said can't be unsaid and sometimes can't be fixed with apologies. There are many ways to manage anger, and one of them is exactly this one- not saying everything that comes into mind, once we are very angry, but either waiting for a bit, and thinking twice before speaking, or keeping it to yourself, and having a conversation later, when everything cools down.

6. Learn to recognize various situations that frustrate you and prepare yourself on time to deal with them in the best way you can think of

Knowing what frustrates you will help you to predict the possibility of getting into an unpleasant situation with other people, which is a very important thing when it comes to managing anger. Not an easy task, indeed, but one of the most important ways to manage anger. Knowing what is your weak point is not always a bad thing, because you can easily know what makes you angry and just be prepared to hold yourself back when things start happening.

7. If not able to control anger, avoid frustrating situations, because it will make your life easier until you learn how to control yourself or how you feel

If you still can't control your anger issues, do your best to avoid situations that frustrate you, if possible, since it will make it easier for you to face them, once you learn other anger management techniques and go back to practicing other anger management skills, since you will be needing them. Avoiding frustrating situations is not a permanent solution, having in mind that, sooner or later, you will have to face certain people or situations, but feel free to give yourself at least some time to properly prepare yourself for them and handle one step after another, until you reach your goal. Remember- you will not reach your goal only if you don't start doing something about it, and once you start- it is just a matter of time.

Learning how to control your anger in some situations and being able to do it will, without questioning make you become a better person for people around you, it will make you be more pleasant for those who love you and less people will be hurt with words you say while dealing with anger issues. It might be hard in the beginning, it might feel impossible even, but it is important to be patient and have a strong will while learning anger management techniques, because they are very useful and many people already have way happier lives because of them.

By Abie Giles

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